Sunday, 24 March 2013

With a Little Help From My Friend(s)

Fate has a way of jumping on you when you least expect it. It's so wondrous and can sometimes get on my nerves but I believe in it either way. Firstly, because it's stated in my belief. But also because it flabbergasts me time and time again. For instance, the time when I finally let go of a guy I once liked so much before Firu, when I realised I wanted something bigger than him, Firu came into my life. When I stopped searching for someone, someone came, catching me off guard. Timing plays a huge role in fate, though. Had I met Firu a little earlier or a little later, we might not have led the life we lead right now. Had we stayed in Jakarta, never left our parents' houses and become a couple like any others, who knew if we would have lasted this long. But that's fate, I guess. Though it meant having to go through a series of different circumstances in a relationship, if that shapes up the present we are living now and the future we hope to accomplish, then bring it on.

Fate works. It doesn't have to always be the big things, like life-changing experiences or choices. It can sometimes be the smallest actions. It might later on change your lives but, at the moment, you probably don't realise it. For instance, the day after Firu left me last week, the sun was shining bright and Saku-chan asked to meet up. At first, I was reluctant, I was still down in the dump and felt like being alone. But I knew myself pretty well to push myself into social situations. If I had been my normal self, I would have liked hanging out with her anyway so we met up. It turned out to be a really great day and I got Firu out of my mind for the rest of the day. I introduced her to Rawon, baked her Banana Muffins and we watched 「おおかみこどもの雨と雪」("Wolf Children: Ame and Yuki"). I loved that movie and felt all warm and fuzzy inside upon watching it. Highly recommended, you guys! All in all, it was a good day and whatever sadness I would have embraced was out of my mind. That's fate, right there.

Unbranded batik dress // Atmosphere blazer // Pieces scarf // Primark coat + brogues // H&M tights // Rilakkuma bag

Personally, I believe that God orchestrates life a certain way to obtain the perfect outcome. Even the littlest things we, with our human eyes, would have missed. Even all the bad things might be a strategy to get to the good stuff. I truly believe that. That's why, though I strongly believe that my days in high school are 3 years I'll never get back, I dare not wish them away if that means I'm never going to get where I am now otherwise. Sure, there are times I would have wished a different storyline to some parts of my life. But, like Aslan said, "To know what would have happened? No. Nobody is ever told that." But there is the here and now where we can fix the mistakes of our past and cross our fingers we won't make the same one again. Because the second mistake isn't a mistake anymore, it's a choice.

I'm pretty sure the rest of the world is sick of winter already and want spring to come already. I feel them, really. This winter seems to draw long and I have no more energy for it. Little by little, I rebel. First of all, I kicked off my boots, wearing brogues instead. Surprisingly, it wasn't all that cold wearing these in the snow. Granted, the snow wasn't very thick. Then I started putting on colours not fit for winter, i.e. this dress and these tights. They fit the sunny day, though, so it wasn't really like rebellion. If this goes on, I'm pretty sure I'll wear summery outfits though snow keeps piling up. By the way, I think Saku-chan's outfits are very adorable. Too bad I never asked her about her outfit details. Rest assured, all of them are bought in Japan. Have a (sunny) Sunday!

P.S: Today Firu's sister is getting married! Too bad we're hundreds of miles away to come and wish her a happy and blessed new life. Congratulations!